I liked how your body? 9 true and inspiring stories of women like us
Today when I watch your old photos, see the serene child, quite ordinary high school student, college student smiling and well-groomed. I do not see the fat man, although all these years I believed that I was fat, moderately handsome and do not deserve too much. This low self-esteem meant that I stopped to control their weight and I gained a lot. “If I’m so fat, I eat as I want, nobody pays attention to me” – so I thought then. Of course, many times tried different diets, help trainers, but never none of this came out, he was eating all the time stress and comforted the food.
My attitude to himself changed in his thirties. It began to annoy me when people looked at me primarily through the prism of my weight and did not see anything more. Earlier I thought that it must be so. I am also tired that I’m that bad for myself, I realized that the soul of the complexes and limitations. I felt the strength agree to each other as I am ready for it and I do not have to please everyone.
The breakthrough came a little over a year ago. I met a coach who helped me get started with physical activity, showed me how to train in the gym, encouraged to try another sport disciplines, motivated and, above all, he sets me mentally and paved the way for small steps. I loved cycling, Nordic walking, hiking and various forms of aerobics.
In the wake of this he went diet, healthy, balanced, wise, without miracles and potions. I got rid of almost 20 kilograms, I want a second and so I believe that I would achieve this goal. Sports made that I liked his body – smooth, capable to change, making it, what I dream. I am far from being in self, I see a lot of things that I would like to change your body, but accept myself as I am and I do not think that real life starts when you lose weight. It continues, here and now. Sports wise food and even taught me one thing – spend time, energy and attention you, your needs and plans. I stopped worrying about who did what to say about me and think I stopped compare and torment. Also helps me taking care of myself – I like to paint, dress in a way that emphasizes the advantages of the silhouette. I have no problem with the fact that the world saw me sweating in a tracksuit, during training, but beyond sport, I try to look feminine.
When I tell my colleagues that figures envy them, they reply that would have given much for my thick hair, or a good complexion. And that’s how it works. Each of us has something beautiful and longs for something else!
Carolina (pictured left)
As a teenager, I did not like her body. I wore the then fashionable slacks and a FUBU sneakers or boots this and a loose blouse. If only it was as little as you can see me.
Looking at my pictures from that period, which may well have only a few (I hated to be photographed), I want to knock his head. I was really slim and shapely, and did not feel so. I was always bigger and higher than their girlfriends, and how you differ from others, it is often a reason for smileys and gossip. I believed that I look very wrong. The older the more I wanted to do something about it. I tried in secret many diet pills, and even what was probably the dumbest, drank once or twice a bubble bath to cause vomiting (all a secret from family). I’m afraid that if I could, and it probably would have bought a tapeworm larvae.
I married young, because in the age of 21, it seemed a great idea. Sitting at home, a very successful relationship with her husband, who fit the fact that I have a problem with self-acceptance, addicted to coca cola and chocolate. I gained 40 kg. I felt even worse. They began to headaches and aching joints me. In November 2015 I said to myself: “enough, so you can not.” I did not want to be unhappy and have zakompleksiona girlfriend and I realized that something must change. I stopped at the beginning of my addiction – coca cola and chocolate, which was very difficult. I began attending Zumba and march on the treadmill. Just – take care of yourself, your body – begin to listen to each other and give priority to, and not as someone you do not like. In January 2016 I left her husband and started all over again. Toxic marriage was already behind me, so I had a clean card and could start all over again.
I just had to decide how to use it. My way of thinking about themselves began to change. Along with cut off all the burdens that plunged me, it was much easier to work on myself liking. I’m still on the bone, I still have cellulite and stretch marks but now I accept myself. I like your body, do not hide in clothes too big. I go head up and a smile on his face, which I hope to infect as many people. I care about how I dress, how I make and if I cared nails and body regularly and peelinguję balsamuję. My current partner as he met me, he told me that he really liked that I was so well-groomed woman, and I repeat it today. He also had a big part in this, I began to accept yourself and your body. Still tells me how beautiful I was and how he loves me, and I see that what it says is sincere. That is why it is so important to surround yourself with the right people in your life. It is not worth wasting time on those who drag us down.
Whether he was a moment when I did not like your body? Probably not. I always felt good in your body, but I saw that there is another, because I have almost 180cm tall. In my family there was a cult of physical fitness, which resulted in various sports and active lifestyle. I remember my dad jogging at a time when people passing by in the park thought that running away from someone. For many years I trained handball, for the next training exceeding the limits of his endurance. Then I served my body to produce results, so I liked them for it, how much for me to do. However, the most shaped my upbringing my parents who pay attention primarily on the value of intellectual and who I am as a man. Maybe that’s why I was so taken over the exteriority and physicality, but always took care of themselves. Such a focus on its internal development gave me the distance and clearance, because I value other than being ideal. Of course I remember that there was a moment during school, when standing out from the standard very small girl, who like most of the boys. But the older I was, the more I discovered how many men I attract. It seems to me that first of all it was just thanks to the personality, because I could work in a confident and experimented with how to interact with others. It was amazing how huge impact on the perception of me was what I said about itself. The better and more confident telling about yourself, the more I saw that just as I start talking about others. That is why very often tell my Obserwatorkom on a blog that is all in our heads, and there begins attractiveness. This is what we think about ourselves and what we say about ourselves resonates around and comes back to us. It’s beautiful, we have a wonderful prospect that we can influence how we feel with each other and how we perceive your body. So I invite you to to start from the inside and then the question when you liked your body will give us a very specific memory of decisions which podjęłyśmy about being free from complexes and happy.
Natalia (pictured right):
Most of his life did not accept yourself and your body. Quickly grew, I’ve always had a strong silhouette, completely different than my friends filigree. From ambient hear all the time that I could lose weight, because I have a pretty face. At home my father threw me for fat people. And I hated their large thighs and ass. The first time I started to lose weight at age 16, on the sly, tablets. After that it went downhill. 25 years of age unless all tried the diet and weight loss agents that were available on the market. Famous hunger strike Fri. Diet Copenhagen I could apply myself after 3-4x in a row, the means for slimming pseudoefedrynie I took months. And still I was not satisfied. It is paradoxical that at a time when I was most meager, I felt all the time that is me too much and should still work on this. Obsessively I thought it was still not enough – after all, BMI calculators all the time showed that I should have a little push. To the extent that anorektyczkom jealous because I could not eat, and bulimiczkom that they could eat what they want and throw up. Because I could not. With the lack of acceptance also I made eating disorders – eating a lot and odchudzałam alternately. Plus I trained as possessed in the gym, but when you are doing it just to correct imperfections forever, it’s no fun. Not even getting to me, that I accept my partner. Later, when we started to apply for the child and repeatedly miscarried because of undiagnosed antiphospholipid syndrome, that’s a thought that is with me out of pity or habit. In the end I came to therapy. It helped, but most of the things I had to get my bearings in the head itself. We can say that this helped me in my daughter – nine months pregnant and lying down in the final 116 kilos completely not care about me when I was only focused on that to successfully born. After a gestation very ashamed to show in the gym, so of course I started from starvation diet – I was angry, exhausted, and I felt bad. And then it came sobering that at this point I was already and now that I am a mother, I can not go back to him. I started small steps once laid his head again. I focused on this, to take care of yourself, your body and your health. Today we no longer believe that my body is disgusting and does not deserve acceptance. Still, of course, I have reservations, but accept the way I look and I have no obsession to hide and disguise any imperfection. I take care of myself – I eat healthy, I rarely eat processed things, I try to enough sleep, crosffit train three times a week – for pleasure, not in order to lose weight. I look in the mirror without bias and on the beach I wear a two-piece outfit. I see that I have stretch marks, cellulite, overweight – but I have them, and not “I am them,” without obscuring my life. Too bad time to yourself for later deposition, thinking “what I’ll do as I have already perfect, thinner, cooler,” because when you have a problem with self-acceptance, this moment can not come.
The story of my (not) self-acceptance, begins many years ago. Since I can remember I was a college / higher than their peers, before I began to mature, which meant that instead of enjoying their budding femininity, I treated it as a little act of God.
I can remember been using slimming diets. For the first time still in primary school – even though my weight certainly be within the healthy BMI.
Diets have not done me no prettier or thinner – on the contrary. This is mainly because of the eternal and the yo-yo effect of weight loss, metabolic problems got sick.
I never had huge complexes, but also hard to say, I liked myself. A lot has changed in my thinking about myself the birth of my daughter. Then I realized what a great job was done and performs every day my body. Is it really deserves to cling to him forever? Is this quest for excellence, understood as being someone else, someone who has a different body, different qualities, different story, no sense at all? Though plowed to the gym and to the end of my days going on lettuce and tomatoes without dressing, there is no chance that I was a petite blonde with narrow hips. I’m just someone else.
Today, as before, to the ideal of a lot of me I am missing, but completely stopped to pursue it. I eat healthy, not because they want to lose weight, but because I care about the health and well being. I am active, I exercise, I ride a bike, I bought a scooter just to keep up with my daughter. 20 years ago probably what people think of me, as I will evaluate acceptance in their eyes. Today, completely I do not do that.
My body is my business. No one more.
The way to like yourself in my case was long and difficult Me today website. As a child, I felt not the best in your skin. I was a girl stands out in every respect – first began to mature, grown as the first, I got the first menstruation. And the children are cruel and every difference or otherness can comment and poke fun. I have heard many nicknames at his address when I walked down the hall in a primary somebody shouted: “See how fat cow goes”, or “to move you świniaku” when he wanted me to pass. Oh, how I embarrassed myself then! When eight or ten year old girl heard these words, there is no chance to be treated with indifference. They really have the power to influence self-esteem and see themselves! I think that then arose within me such a strong desire to change. I fell so in the diet phase, a moment later became popular facility. As a teenager, pretty much I abused your body sport. Still later came the strengthening phase of exploration in men’s eyes and fall into such relationships or relationships that really had no chance of success. It conditioned from their opinions and words. And I let myself mistreat.
At some point, somewhere around thirty, on the occasion of the meeting of women met Maori shaman. I remember that she looked at me, and said tenderly touched a fairly significant sentence: “Honey, you’re gonna hate me for what I say, but your body really needs love.” Then I weighed 96 kg, and I hated myself completely myself I did not care about the physical sense. This meeting resulted in me some kind of Encouragement and caring towards each other.
Step by step, the first time in my life, I started a fair way to like each other. With all the baggage that I carry. My body still has a tremendous history of injuries, perturbations and carries a lot of emotion, including these beautiful and touching. I began to explore it, check call. I stopped this fear. I understood that this is important!
I also started to examine what traffic really likes my body. I started to eat what healthier, get to know the flavors. I started to care about people, whom I have around me and the quality of the relationship. I liked dancing, I went back to swimming, I bought a bicycle. And I can say that I feel good in your body, even in redundant locations. Today I know that traffic is important, and if I stop moving, something is happening in my emotions, something bad, what stops me. Then stop to take care of yourself, put on a tracksuit, I stop to paint, like the wilderness. I see it quite diagnostically, because these behaviors are not after me, they are not healthy. And I know that taking care of yourself is a continuous path, decisions, allowing for pleasure and also self-discipline. And my body allows me these beautiful and wonderful things to experience.
I always liked my body, although I had high expectations for him. When I was a teenager, I thought that I too massive thighs, but I enjoyed my flat, sculpted stomach. In time I was able to get rid of most of the barriers and prohibitions, which entrenched itself. I’ve never been on a diet. When I wanted to lose some weight, I thought of what I eat and practiced. Today important to me that my body was healthy and beautiful the way for me. I am a mother, breast-fed, tyłam pregnancies and chudłam after them – all these moments have left their traces here and there in the form of stretch marks, folds or broken capillaries. I do not mind. I like my body and have a good feel to it. I am glad that I can say.
I not always liked your body. I complexes typical for teens and twenties: not a leg, not such ears, to improve the complexion, small breasts, protruding knee … A lot has changed only when I crossed thirty. Matured internally, I went through therapy, I stopped to be a girl, and I became a woman. And femininity discovered their potential. In the third decade of life, I felt, not just understand what it means to be each other just a good, sensitive, caring, gentle, attentive to their needs. Previously, it was not so obvious to me, before me that one specifically taught. On his way to accept your body and femininity, I met two wonderful women: Iza Malec-Cisek, coacherkę body, and Karo Akabal, teacher conscious sexuality. Thanks to them I learned to trust the signals coming from the body and guard its borders. I felt what it means to be fully sensual and sexual. I listen to what the body tells me what he wants, what he wants pleasure, and which completely rejects. The body has become a festive for me and therefore I give him an important place. Taking care of it is not very pleasant ritual: I use good cosmetics, oils loved, I go for a massage, enough sleep, dance, sometimes I exercise, I eat well, dress so that I was comfortable and feminine … After thirty strongly underestimated is what I am, what I look like, without changing, without excessive correction, but acceptance. It is a process in which all the time I am. I know I have imperfections, but I do not push yourself. Yes, sometimes I turn my inner critic, but I’m doing better disarming him. I take myself as I am. I’m almost 37 years old and I’ve never felt together and do better.
It seems to me that the question of whether someone likes or does not like your body closes in confidence. In building self-esteem. I started it because I needed while raising children. I had to know your value and self above all, to determine which boundaries are important to me and less important, which can bend, where the transition is impossible. By building your self-confidence, I began to accept that I am. Simply and very naturally. I am as I am. Knowing that a lot can change itself and the profit and loss account – or if things do not lose anything for me, more important, for example, a quiet moment with a book – really helps. And yes, it probably sounds naive, but to fall in love with your own body, you have to like each other, realize its value, which is no matter what width will have or how waist circumference.